-------------------------------awkward---------------------------------------
This should be the title of the story of my life. Today I went to talk to my thesis class professor and I was so bad at talking, I think she actually started thinking that I have some sort of speech (/mental) disorder. Which actually made me feel a little better about it all, strangely.
Maybe I should go get medically tested and have myself officially declared with either a speech and/or mental impediment. You know, one of those things which, like a learning disorder, doesn't quite mean you're stupid...perhaps some sort of "social ineptitis"
Then when I'm feeling awkward I can just flash my card and say, "See?! I'm medically allowed to be this way." Thus, ironically, dispelling the awkwardness by using a charming mix of self-awareness, deprecation, and humor.

Bored. Bored and dissatisfied.
I had great fun over thanksgiving, getting to see Aaron and getting to hang out with PEOPLE again. But the contrast between then and now is...unacceptable.
If I could only have a worry-free day, though, I would be contented to wait till Christmas for my life to start up again. (I know this time was supposed to get me used to fending for myself, etc., but really? I can fend for myself, I'm doing it fine, and I just want some fun now.)
Madame Enos once said that her 40s were her best years--she felt comfortable in her skin, and everything was good.
So I can't wait till I feel that way, even if it necessitates developing some wrinkles and a few gray hairs.
Though until then, I will have fun being my awkward self.

THANKSGIVING!
Tuesday-- Went into work in the afternoon after meeting with my 18th century Aphra Behn prof (who is the epitome of how I want to be when I am that age...but I'll never achieve that bc I'm nowhere as funny and...English.) Survived on about 2 hours of sleep all day. Went out after work to get automatic feeder for fish as I was not prepared to carry the aquarium down the stairs. Almost keeled over having to pack up the car anyway. Don't know how I got home, but I ended up there eventually.
Wednesday--This is actually a continuation of Tuesday, seeing as I got into bed and proceeded to talk to my sister till I had to get up at 4 am, take a shower, and pick up Aaron at the airport. Became a wanderer for the day, went to Aaron's house to sleep for a bit, then Jimmy's house where we all played some music, and reconsidered the categorization of Jimmy’s DVD collection, and then to Jared's house, where there was a huge crowd of people.
Thursday--hung out at the house, watched quite a number of mediocre movies with my cousins. chilled.
Friday--drove up to Austin with Aaron for the day. Had Dog Almighty for the first time in months. Delicious. Then when we got home, we took my sister to a midnight showing of Walk the Line. Good movie. I'm obsessed, and I will buy it. Then IHOP, then home, around 3 am.
Saturday--Galleria with Aaron and my sister and her bf Khriiiiiiiis. Seriously, that's how he spells his name. He fails all his tests bc he doesn't finish writing his name before the bell rings.
Then, dropped the kids off and went to Harry Potter with Aaron. High point: mini dragons. Then, went home with Aaron and gave him a haircut in his garage. At this point, he was falling asleep while I cut his hair.
Sunday--Arboretum and lunch with his parents. Then I went home and crashed for a few hours before I had to drive back to Austin.

Ok, well, missed a few things in there, but inshort, or innotsoshort, that was my Thanksgiving. Pretty awesome, and I'm still recovering.

I should've been doing so much homework today, not to mention packing. But instead, I went to the lake with Elissa and Rachel, and intentionally ignored the homework I brought along. And then one thing led to another and...("can I get someone to insert that Indigo Girls soundtrack right...here?") Ha ha just kidding.
Anyways, one thing led to another (mostly due to the fact that I discovered Grand Theft Auto and a playstation at Elissa's apartment--oh sweet nectar of the...um Rockstar Game Corporation) and we ended up at Elissa's apartment eating delicious salsa a la Aaron Ballman and queso, scrounging up 3-D glasses, and watching a semi-cheesy and yet intriguing tv show. It was nice. And I might as well do this now--a blanket apology for that time a couple years ago, when I put down an ex-bf of a friend. I'm a vain bitch, I know. But it was a long time ago, so no more ganging-up-ons anymore, ok?
Anyways, damn. Having not got any hw done today, I might very well be staying up late tonight.
I have been having identity issues. Sometimes I fear I need a major personality makeover, but apparently I have nothing but the makeup artist from the Devil's Rejects at hand. A ridiculously gory and disturbing movie, by the way--you know Rob Zombie's done his job right when you feel a distinct vomit-like pressure right under your breastbone all the way through the movie. And I have seen quite a few gruesome horror movies.

I will see Aaron in 31 hours--eek! life is good.

"god it's good to be alive
i'm torn in pieces
i'm blind and waiting for...
my heart is reeling
i'm blind and waiting for you"
-goo goo dolls, big machine

I'm thinking about pinstriped converse next.

That thesis class very nearly kills my mondays and wednesdays. Today after class, my only recourse was an increase of volume on the ipod.
But I ended up talking to this girl from class who apparently feels the same way (though perhaps less angry...) and by the time I got back to the IV I was almost chill enough to tolerate the Jack Johnson that it had shuffled to...almost.
Pin from the Yeah Yeah Yeahs always makes me want to do a wild Indian dance. Ok. Native American. At least I didn't way "wild Injun dance."
Me and Elissa had a fun time last night returning a video, and illegally buying a kid's meal at Schlotsky's. Hey I take what I can get fun-wise when I barely have time to sit down when I take a... well I'll leave that to your imagination.
I think I'm starting to get an ulcer thinking about all the things I have to do and all the things that could go wrong.
In any case, I really shouldn't let anything get to me at all. Seeing as I get to see Aaron in two weeks!
"...cause someone's coming home"
-the john and the mayer.