"We had date nights on Thursdays or Fridays, I can't remember. So we'd leave early, linger over dinner, and get back early so we could get [our child] to bed, since she had school in the morning...The babysitter would get there at 5, and leave at 7, 7:30. Sometimes we'd just go grocery shopping without the kid."
I'm working at the library and eavesdropping on the conversation of two women--the one who said the above was trying to convince the other to have another child before she gets too much older. And then, the conversation sidetracked to the above quote, where she describes what her life was like when her kids were younger.
The hopelessness of her situation strikes fear into my heart. The bright spot of my whole week after having a kid is a two hour block once a week to grocery shop in peace? Hmm. No thanks. I really don't understand the popularity of procreation. Is biology so all-powerful?
2 comments:
i don't know what to say about this but i can feel an opinion somewhere in my stomach.. i think the responsibility is worth it. And the quote didn't sound like grocery shopping without the kid was the highlight of her week.. maybe i read it wrong..?
It sounds like your biggest fear on having kids is the responsibility and full-time commitment, but you have so many time commitment things already that having a kid wouldn't phase you too much. you're used to having a baby already.. cough, dwight.
you can be a mommy of a cyoot baby jenjen!
actually my biggest fear is that I won't love the kid as much as Dwight, and thus will not even be willing to put in as much effort as I put into Dwight...despite the fact that kids need so much more work than dogs.
I guess I feel like there's not that much benefit in having kids--they won't cuddle with you or show you all that much affection after a certain time period (for me as a kid, I stopped showing affection for my parents by about age 4...and some of my first memories are hating having to nap with my dad.)
Whereas a dog will always love you.
Also, you can't put a baby in a crate when you need to concentrate on other things. A dog takes up about 40% of your life, and it seems to me a kid takes up about 95%. I am not ready for the self effacement, and it worries me that I might never be ready.
Actually, I always loved kids up until I was about 20, at which point I stopped thinking about them, and now that I'm forced to think about them, I have become really averse to them. Part of it, I think, is being totally depressed due to school. The other part of it is feeling trapped as a kid up to high school, since my parents were so strict, I never got to do what I wanted. So I got addicted in college to doing whatever I wanted...and then I trapped myself again by going to med school. So I am in need of at least a few selfish years before I can even consider having a kid.
Oh, and did you know that it is quite common to tear the space between the vag and the anus completely while giving birth? A doctor has to sew it back up, layer by layer, thus diminishing your ability to remain continent with your bowel movements. You can't control your poop!
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